Hey, isn’t it something that in a nation of 300 million people that we can only have presidents from two families? You know, the whole Bush-Clinton-Bush-y aqui viene otro Clinton thing. I don’t know about all of you other good Americans, but I’m tired of it.

It’s like when Roger Ebert reviews a film and when he comes out of he says the movie left him exhausted. Man, that’s the way I feel about the Bushies and the Clintons.

 Chisme has seen both of these families in action. Way back when Bush the old man was VP under Ronald, Chisme heard George Sr. give an Ollie North God-Bless-America speech at the convention center in McAllen. Tu sabes, it was OK, real Republican and everything. Then years later when W was running for guv against Ann Richards, Chisme got to hang around some with future prez when younger George’s best friend in these parts was Brownsville boy Tony Garza, who would later marry a billionaire Mexican chick.  Chisme doesn’t remember much about meeting W back then other than telling a buddy, “I’m telling you, this guy really loves baseball.”

With the Clintons, Chisme remembers all the buzz when Big Bill visited the Rio Grande Valley a week before all of the Monica guato broke. All the Mexicans around here went ga-ga when Elvis visited the premises. First Bill went to Mission/McAllen, and then his copter headed to a hangar at the Brownsville airport ,where the obligatory marachis had to wait like two hours for Clinton to show because the president of the free world took extra long to eat his expensive and catered enchilladas at the mansion of McAllen rich guy Alonzo Cantu.

Hillary came down when Bill was sleep walking to his re-election over boring Bob Dole in `96, with the First Lady in expensive pant suits sweating it out with the masses at the old bingo/dance hall next to la Porter in Brownsville. The Mexicans, of course, went ga-ga, even when Hill, reading from an index card, yelled, “I just love Brownsville!” The marachis that would play for Bill were there too, and so grateful that Hill actually believes in being on time.

Next to African-Americans, Mexicans love the Clintons the most. If it were up to blacks and Hispanics, Bill and Hill could just take turns being president until they became viejitos, and then they’d check if Chelsea was reading to step up. Pero, come on people, can we move on, por favor?

Just today, Chisme was reading a NY Times article that says even among women Hillary has a 40 percent unfavorable rating, even while the vast majority concede Hill is one bad woman not to be messed with. The Republicans know this, of course, and are so desperate about the situation that they appear willing to go with Rudy G., a pro-choice, pro-immigrant GOP guy, but who has the goods on sounding tough.

Anyway, Chisme is already tired even before thinking about all of the right-wing radio meltdowns if Hill becomes president. Sean Hannity’s fat head might explode right through your radio at the sight of Hill raising her left hand with her right hand on a leftist/liberal Bible as she takes the oath to ruin America, and thereby sets off the latest round of `I hate Hillary’ books.

 America needs some fresh air. Maybe Oprah’s endorsement of Obama will make a dent in the Hillary & Bill political machine. If not, oh well, a new President Clinton can visit the Valley, and at least we don’t have to worry about a sex scandal breaking the next week.

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